Friday, October 14, 2011


Been a lil' while since I posted here on this blog.  Life has stepped in and taken over.  My job is overwhelming and suck-y at best.  I have a job.  Therefore, I try not to complain to incredible much. Along with life stepping in and taking over.  So has depression and anxiety along with it.  There are good days.  There are bad days.  There are just plain shouldn't this day just start over days. 

I would have never thought that being 6+ years post disruption (seems like it was JUST FREEKING YESTERDAY) I would still miss my boy as much as I do.  Often wonder if the lil bits of info we get from him from time to time makes it harder.  I guess I will never know. 

I don't miss the drama. I don't miss the rages.I don't miss the pissing everywhere. I don't miss all the RAD crap.

I miss him.  I miss his infectious smile. I miss the way he loved his sister.  I miss being his mom.  I miss being able to take his Senior Pictures. I miss not being able to see him go off to Prom or Homecoming.....I miss those things.


1 comment:

beemommy said...

you cannot love these kids like we do and not hurt. Physically impossible. I'm sorry that you're hurting.still. Wish I could hug you, missing you and my trauma mamas. Take care.