Wednesday, March 9, 2011

More thoughts on Orlando 2011

I've thought a great deal about my weekend in Orlando. 
I've started, stopped, backed up, deleted, erased and came back over and over again. 
Mostly in part because I find myself feeling very very vulnerable.
The entire time I was Cor's mom....I was judged. 
By my husband.
By my family.
By my friends.
By the professionals in our life.
By everyone!
I'm not saying that to 'over-kill' it. 

It is what it is - one might say.

However, the damage is done. 

No matter who you are I will be leary of you.  Unless you are Corey because you have held out your hand (or your email, text, blah blah blah) and you are walking a journey of pain and sorrow .  Unless you are Christine because you've not only adopted from a disruption but you also blog about it....(btw: this post is when I said 'hey...she frign gets it. hot damn").  There are more of you. I know.  Oh' how I know. I spoke to one of you today on my way to work.  I hung up and then went into work w/swollen face from sitting in my car for another 20 min. in a puddle of tears.  
I can't really accurately state what I'm wanting to head is spinning.  From Orlando. From the the emotional aspect that it had on my heart....which was much harder than ever expected.  And from a legal/political/job stand point - as our Senate did something rather unethical and from all reports thus far illegal.  Regardless, it effects me.  In a rather negative way.  It will effect my children, my family. 
  Read this post by Christine if you do NOTHING ELSE.


Diana said...

:-) Just keep swimming, friend. No judgement from here!

Tara - SanitySrchr said...

I have NOT been there, but you will never ever get any judgment from me!