Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Sick Day w/o Pay

Today I took a sick day. Because my new job does not have 'sick pay' it was with out pay. If you read my other blog you can/will see that the last week has been filled with lots of chaos on the work end.

Yesterday am I started with another one of 'those' head aches. At firs I thought it was because the idiot middle school'r tried to crawl out of the moving motor coach bus that I drive to take his idiot self to school in...and well..the stress alone w/that was enough to give anyone a headache. Interesting thought...the special ed teacher who has been getting on at the "bad" bus stop the last few weeks was riding yesterday. She shocked the crap out of me. After I cut open a new rear end on said child the kids were mocking me. Ungreatful jerks. (sorry...I'm not real positive about my job right now). I was PO'd beyond compare and for the first time my anger really showed. I guess she knew that if she didn't say what she did...I would. I''m glad it was her and not me. She says "YOU ALL better shut the F_ up before she calls the cops"...and then a few other words in there. WOW...a TEACHER said this!! You know their bad when the teacher talks like that to them.

So...that could have been the reason for my headache.

Then it gets worse. Yesterday afternoon the crap city busses that I drive for the crap kids...breaks down. Envisionn being stranded with 60 middle school kids....enough to give anyne a headache.

In the middle of this..I receive a text message from my dh that goes something like this...

" call - Kim no show - bry lft @ schl" 2nd text reads... "on wy hm nw..."

Kim...was SUPPOSED to be our NEW babysitter. SHE no show no called for her first day on the job. She showed yesterday am and dh shows her the ropes. Then doesn't' pick my son up from school . Damn it anyway!! N ow...we ahve to GO BACK to old babysitter at their house...NOT good.

Last night I finish up the 2 online classes that I'm taking. There were 1/2 semester classes and and were due next week. Yippee...I have a week off (well not from that damn algebra) before the next online class starts.

5:00 am this morning...

Alarm goes off. OMflippen heck I think I'm going to die. Hit snooze. DH tries waking me "R U awake" NO leave me sleep...I have a headache...

I get up and nearly pass out while trying to shower and get ready for work.

I CAN NOT go to work like this. My head hurt so bad I wanted to cry. Oh' wait...I did cry. That just made it worse. DUH.

I call in and the supv. on the other endof the phone says "Work related?" I say "NO and then chuckle to myself" He says "return to work date" "HUH...this afternoon maybe...maybe not till tmw.." He repeats himself. is 5am...I can barely think straight, my head feels like someone hit me w/a hammer and you ae asking me when I'm coming back to work and if it was work related...crap. So I said this afternoon. I went back to bed. The chuckling was thinking "hell yes this is work related I breathe those fumes every day and then those kids are going to kill me..."

My dh called my other boss at my other job and told them I wouldn't be in today either...I've worked there 2 yrs...they know by now that i dont' call in sick unless I am sick or need a mental health day...I took a mental health day from them last Wednesday. lol.

My dh even tried calling my dr to get me in w/her. No luck. He calls me back and tell me to go too the urgent care. Sure honey in my spare time when my head isn't laying wide open.

I go back to bed. Wake up at 9am.!!!

Shower...again because somehow I think hot water will help. silly me.

I end up going to the urgent care around 10 am.

I left the urgent care at 1:59 PM~! I was taken back w/in 30 mn. of being there. I spent 3 horrific hours in that damn room. Now when you have a migrane...sleeping on a dr. table really isn't 'ideal'. I did though. They even had the lab tech come to my room and draw blood. hahaha... I casually mentioned to the gal that I had to get labwork done today for an appt. I have tmw w/my hemotologist. Guess she didn't think I needed to go down there.

The shot they gave me did help. Some. Not. Really. It gave me a "hang over" head ache. Not to mention I thought I might be having a heart attack w/in 30 seconds of the nurse giving it to me. I didn't.. The doctor seemed to think I looked 100% better when she finally released me to go home. I actaully did for a while. I even went to a store to see if they had any Wii's in stock - sillly me. How naive of me to think they would.

The moral of this long drawn out stupid post.....

I have no clue why my head hurts.

I have no clue why my head hurts.

I have no clue why today of all days...I really miss C.orry.

I have no clue why today of all days...I feel like it just happened yesterday.

Some professionals might say that this "migrane" was induced because of the C.orr.y thoughts today. If you are one of those professionals I'm going to say screw that thought!!

Regardless, I spent many hours in bed today and well when that happens naturally the other thoughts seem to be filtering in and out of my pea-body-brain.

As I laid in bed today thinking about Cor naturally my mind went to my job and the dorkass children that I take to and from school and how "they" are the same age as Cor is. Interesting thought...

I'm off to bed because I do have to go to work tmw. I can't afford to miss work 2 days in a row w/o pay. So no matter how bad the headache is, no matter how much I want to bang my head into the freeking wall, I have to go....


Keri said...

Topamax has really helped my migraines. Hope you get relief.

Anonymous said...

I found your blog through another blog while I was searching about disruption. I read through all of it and have learned so much, I cant imagine what any of you went through, I wont even pretend to try. I have been trying to read up as much as I can, to try and just be a friend to someone who is going through a similar situation.

In reading, I noticed a couple times you referred to God not giving you more than you can handle. I dont know if this will help at all, but I felt led to share it with you.

I think its interesting how often this verse is misquoted…I Cor 10:13 says "No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it."
It doesn’t say He won’t "give" you more than you can bear, He won’t let you be “tempted” more than you can bear. He most definitely allows things to happen that one cannot bear. Why some more than others only God knows.
2 Cor 1:8 Paul says "We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired even of life. vs 9- Indeed, in our hearts we felt the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead"

Far beyond our ability to endure

Beth Moore puts it this way....
When our hardships surpass our ability to endure, God wants us to discover His...
Surpassing POWER 2 Cor 4:7
Surpassing GLORY 2 Cor 4:17
Surpassing COMFORT 2 Cor 1:3-5

I know this doesn’t change or possibly even help what you and your family went through, easier said than done, but I know for me in my own circumstances, which have nothing to do with adoption or disruption, I don’t have to live with the feeling of guilt in thinking I didn’t do enough, that I am less of a Christian because I couldn’t handle it and it really was more than I could bear.
An amazing burden was lifted by just knowing that people really are given more than they can bear.
I pray that in the very least, you feel His surpassing comfort.